I recall advice that somebody gave to me years and years ago about handling emotional upsets. Like, say, your partner up and walked out on your relationship. You're angry. You're hurt. You might want to get even. Do something hurtful back. But the advice that was given to me, which I'll pass along to you, is to instead imagine this person in a favorable light. I realize this is unthinkable to some, but just bear with me.
The image was a pink cloud. You could conjure up any happy image you want. So, you plaster this person's face on a pink cloud in your head, and you focus on that image. Pretty soon all those feelings begin to fade. Because you've changed the way you are thinking. When your personal thinking changes, your feelings change as well.
There are those of us who like to feel rotten. Seriously. These people wallow in it. It's their god-given right, damn it, so they're gonna muck around kicking small dogs. These types of people are toxic. I try to stay away from them.
See, attitude is everything. It's such a simple premise. It's too simple for some people, so they disregard it.
Right now, I have an upset third-party vendor in a Sacramento short sale. This vendor leaves me voice mails, sends emails and would probably be standing outside my house pitching rolls of toilet paper into my maple trees if this person calmed down enough to find out where I live. This person created the problem, not I. This is one thing that being a Sacramento short sale agent teaches me. To not react.
My friend, Lisa, is pictured above with the Miss Elgin Western Days Queen, Erin Ramirez. Lisa earns her living as Jakey the Clown in Austin, Texas. She's my best friend -- known her since junior high school and love her to pieces. I admire her and her attitude. No matter what happens to Lisa, she is always upbeat and positive. She scrapes by month after month, has survived her share of health issues, car problems, vet bills, drought, deferred home maintenance disasters, friends and neighbors dropping dead, heat indexes of 105, pest control -- I hear red ants are a huge problem in Austin -- and she keeps right on smiling. Always feeling the love.
She managed to buy a home with acreage -- as a self-employed person, which means she didn't get a loan from the bank. On the weekends, she works at flea markets, fairs, festivals and what have you, blowing up balloons into shapes of animals and selling them. One of her nephews from the Midwest came to visit, so she took him along to work.
Put him under a tree, tacked a sign to the tree that read: Hilarious jokes for a measly 10 cents. This kid sold jokes that afternoon. He earned $2.50, which means he sold 25 jokes. That's pretty good. I heard his brother earned $30 last year; he was a hustler. I don't think I could do that. Because I can never remember any jokes much less the punchlines. I'm a horrible joke teller. But it made me wonder:
If you were stuck under a tree at a county fair and expected to sell your wares, what would you sell? No computers, no Internet, no tech toys. Just you.
Photos: Lisa Jacobson, Jakey the Clown
Certified HAFA Specialist
Sacramento Real Estate Listings
Elizabeth Weintraub is an author, home buying expert for About.com, a Land Park resident, and a veteran real estate agent who specializes in older, classic homes in Land Park, Curtis Park, Midtown and East Sacramento, as well as tract homes in Elk Grove, Natomas, Roseville and Lincoln. Weintraub is also a Sacramento Short Sale agent who lists and successfully sells short sales throughout the four-county Sacramento area with an emphasis on Elk Grove. Call Elizabeth Weintraub at 916.233.6759. Put 40 years of real estate experience to work for you. Broker-Associate at Lyon Real Estate. BRE License # 00697006.
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Photo: Unless otherwise noted in this blog, the photo is copyrighted by Big Stock Photo and used with permission.The views expressed herein are Weintraub's personal views and do not reflect the views of Lyon Real Estate. Disclaimer: If this post contains a listing, information is deemed reliable as of the date it was written. After that date, the listing may be sold, listed by another brokerage, canceled, pending or taken temporarily off the market, and the price could change without notice; it could blow up, explode or vanish. To find out the present status of any listing, please go to elizabethweintraub.com.